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 Sharing Experience vs Opinion

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God_Chaser Posted - April 09 2003 : 12:01:13 PM
I relate better when folks share there experience and I can feel the difference in my guts between experience when shared and opinions when delivered....Something happens in my stomach that arouses mistrust and suspicion which inevitably leads to being mildly angered.

It happens in meetings and it happens in daily life. Sometimes I confront it when I think it is important to do so and sometimes I ignore it when I don't want the hassle. It tends to cause some degree of discomfort among bystanders who then react setting off a chain of emotional responses that lead to further misunderstandings

If I am asked for my opinion, I'll give it but most of the time even my opinions are based on personal experience, things I have gone through, learned or observed.

In AA the proven method of success is based on the foundation of one alcoholic sharing their personal experience with another and because of that one thing it is proven to be extremely beneficial.....perfect for an alkie like me!


Michael

"In hoc cognoscent omnes quia mei estis discipuli si dilectionem habueritis ad invicem."

Thomas Merton
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Samf Posted - April 09 2003 : 6:29:25 PM
I still catch myself giving my opinion or thoughts, sometimes, even though I have always found it more loving when someone else shares about them. Even though I solicit opinions.
I had a friend who used to say, before their share, "I don't want your well-thought out advice. I don't want your opinion. I just want your experience, strength and hope." "I just want to puke this stuff up and leave it there.", was another.
There is one old guy, back from where I used to live, who just comes in, says what he wants, when his turn comes, and leaves.
I am fairly certain that I give opinions and thoughts because it is habitual, and because it always felt safer than telling you about me. If I tell you about my thoughts, it is not that big a deal.
But if my heart is motivating me, I end up sharing from my heart, and it seems to work better.
Am still learning. Have a long way to go.


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